Get out. Relationships are about good AND bad times. You can't pick and choose when to respect and love someone. Get out before it turns into more than just verbal and emotional abuse. Because that is what he is doing. He is verbally and emotionally abusing you.

This sounds like abuse to me. You need to seek the help and support of professionals and those around you. Once you are set free from him you will know that your ideas of relationships were skewed. Get out now!

Stop giving love to someone who doesn't deserve it. Stop letting him abuse you. Get into counseling to figure out WHY you repeatedly subject yourself to hatred and abuse.

Your "love" is blinding you from what an awful person he is to you. Break up with him and move on. He doesnt love you and if you'd open your eyes you'd see that he doesnt care about you either. He is pulling you along like a little puppy dog and playing mindgames with you. Be a woman and get the hell out of this "relationship" for good!

Good luck

"Don't fall for someone who's not willing to catch you"

Gees you sound so young...there are more guys out there...I swear. Find someone else that will apperciate you.

"We are all the same colour when you turn off the lights"

perhaps you should "take a break"

What you have with him doesn't sound like love, it sounds like an addiction.

Are you kidding me that you "can't" walk away from him? I know that seems so romantic and all but seriously, it's not all that healthy.

Have some respect for yourself and move on!

He is verbally and emotionally abusing you, without a doubt. I have been with someone like this, and trust me, he will NOT change. Whatever you do, DO not have kids with this man. He will also abuse them. Please get counselling to try to understand why you love someone that abuses you and treats you so terribly. You are making the decision to be with him, and therefore can make the decision to not be with him. You are not seeing the situation clearly because you probably already had low self-esteem (probably why he picked you, because no woman with good self-esteem would endure his behaviour). So, now that you have been with him for awhile, he has reduced your self-esteem to even lower than it was before. So now, you think that you need to be with him, yet being with him makes you feel terrible about yourself.

That is not real love, because your partner should make you feel better about yourself and happier, not sad, hurt and confused. Once you get out of this situation for awhile and get some perspective, you will think to yourself: why did I allow any man to treat me this way and just put up with it? Please get counselling. Good luck to you.

Read the book "Why does he do that!?"

Also, read the post on here "Sailing in a story relationship" because that is where you are heading if you marry this guy or make a commitment to him. Sounds like a scary place to be to me.

The very fact that you say you "can't" leave him (which is a complete crock, btw) says a lot about your state of mind. If you are too unwilling/weak, etc. to leave an unhealthy relationship, you have absolutely no business being in any relationship whatsoever. That being said, I assume you are of legal age since you mention college, so you are free to run your life into the ground if you so choose. Just do not have any kids.

I doubt you're going to take the overwhelming majority of advice here seriously because you're so entrenched in the drama, but at the very least, it sounds like you need to make your life more about you and less about him. Get out more and start doing something productive like taking martial arts classes (aside from boosting your self-esteem and fitness levels, it might come in handy when your boyfriend eventually crosses the line between physical and emotional abuse, cause trust me, that's coming up next).

Also, the point of dating is to discern whether or not you want someone in your life for the long term as they are now. Not if you can fix/nag/manipulate them into something better. If you choose this kind of life for yourself, just know that it is your choice and in my opinion that removes the whole option of playing the victim. I know that seems harsh but actually it's quite an empowering concept.

I know how hard it is to leave (believe me, I do), but you need to find some way to rebuild yourself. Your self-esteem is rock-bottom, and though I don't doubt that you love him, I don't think that what the two of you share is love. Relationships like yours are isolating. Talk to someone--a friend, your mom, a therapist. You need to let others know what is going on, because they will help you through it...and because THEY love you, not some guy who hurts you over and over again. Also, use the fact that you're going to different schools to help you through this. I was once in a relationship like yours, and the only way it really ended after three years was because he moved to another city, and I HAD to be without him. Let it be a clean break for you. You deserve SO much more.

this sounds like the Boyfriend I just broke up with. I am a very giving, and loving person. he, on the other hand, was very selfish, and it sounds like your guy is the same. my ex would get angry VERY easily. If something was bothering me and i tried to talk it out with him he would get furious and tell me I am too emotional, or say I was just PMSing. He never wanted to work out our differences, he just wanted to forget the probmel at hand and act as if nothing had happen. We were together for 2 years when I finaly had enough. leaving him was the hardest thing I have ever done, but probably the best thing I have done. these types of men are ok for short term relationships, but you need to find someone who RESPECTS you and your relationship enough to work things out with you. if he doesnt want to hear about your emotions or how you feel, then he doesnt really care about you.

Yeah, I've been there - it gets worse. Please, please, please, get out now! You say you love him, but he knows how to belittle and manipulate your emotions.

This guy sounds like a total d-bag. Sorry. If i were you, I would get out now. I agree with princess, it will only get worse. It will be tough and it may hurt for a while, but you deserve someone that treats you well all the time, not just some of the time. Good luck to you!!! Hugs!!!

Darlin', this is what we call being dependent, not being in love. If you don't feel like a whole person on your own, then you probably shouldn't be in any kind of relationship, because you will be putting a tremendous amount of pressure on that person. And if that person happens to be kind of jerk who doesn't treat you with respect, it's even worse. I would advise you to end this hurtful relationship and spend some time figuring who you are by yourself.

My ex used to behave like this. It was like walking on eggshells and he's just want me to forget about it. Including the three times he cheated on me. He was like "are you still hung up on that?" Yeah, do you know why it is? It's because your relationship has become an addiction and there is no love anymore.

Awww...there are other men!! I promise and it may take awhile to forget about him, but you are much better off without him. He's one of those that treats you like crap until he knows you might dump him and then ends up doing something SOOooo romantic that you can't leave. You CAN leave and you should! Break up with him, try no contact for 30 days, go out and do some things you've always wanted to do, be good to yourself! Eventually you'll realize he's an *sshole and you'll find someone MUCH better!

GET OUT. i was there a few years back. he gets upset if you get emotional? this is hte person you deem closest to you. he needs to be a man nad handle your ups and downs and not have u walking on egg shells.
i know u think ur life will be hopeless without him but after a tough period trust me u will realize you CAN do better and wonder why u took his sh%^ in the first place.
trust me i know

I know its tough, but you need to move on right away. This is abuse not love. You are clinging to this relationship because you are young and going through a lot of changes, but you need to think of yourself here.

I have gone through a similar situation. My current boyfriend of 2 years has an intense temper. When he is mad he becomes emotionally abusive towards me, this man has called me all the bad words you can think of, and it even got as far as to where he pushed me and i fell on the floor. I was so upset and scared that i seriously thought about breaking up. The thing was that normally he treats me like a queen ( i am not even exaggerating, he sometimes refers to me as his queen to his friends and other people), so the idea of breaking up was killing me. We sat down and after maybe three or four times of dealing with his violent behavior, we came to a middle point where he agreed to deal with his anger as long as i tweaked a few things about my character. We have been together for 2 years now and i have not seen his violent outboursts in months, and its just getting better. We still get into arguments like any normal couple but now we both know what to do and what to not do in order to avoid violent situations. Many of my friends begged me to leave him when this was first happening, and i really did think hard about it, but I stayed and sticked it out and was proactive about it and now we are happyier than ever. So sit down with him and really try to come up with a solution( if possible). One of the biggest tricks is to be strong and let him see that he cant walk all over you. If he really loves you...trust me he will change.

My cousin is going through the same thing with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend is the same exact way as your boyfriend. This relationship isn't healthy at all, you need to leave him seriously. It's not going to get any better the longer you stay in it.

Yeah, you do sound young, and you sound as if you don't talk to each other too.

If EVERYONE tells you that you are too good for him. Then you probably are.

Why would he get upset at you for not calling him if he didn't call you either? What kind of strange excuse is that? A phone can be used to make calls too, you know. By the way, not talking to your boyfriend of a year and a half for weeks at a time is not really normal.

And seeing as he is continually cruel to you when there is an argument, he's obviously not keeping his promises to "never do it again".

I think this college separation will be good for you. Try to stay strong and hang out with your friends, old and new. The change of surroundings will help.

Good luck.

Protect your heart until you find someone who can do it better than you.

Controlling! Future Abuser! Run like H*ll away from this guy! "You don't have to forget him, you just have to leave him behind." I hope you will!